Fu re ru

[apassingafternoon]

Alain was having none of their shit and that was just by the mere virtue of being completely and utterly out of it. Kaine had thought it would be alright to use an extra drop or two but ... Well, it was that or his own exhaustion that kept him out of it. For as much as Kaine wanted to lie around and ignore everyone, tend to her house and hardly the people inside of it Nariko had a point. They were to rest for a week before moving on. The quicker they dealt with the out of the way errands the sooner she could sit in her room for as long as Nariko would allow before inevitably dragging her back out.

Which explained why they were on the road to The Village, or Arpagio as it was now known. The name changed was ridiculous (Aelious must have somehow gotten his way) but Kaine accepted it with a shrug. The journey was a boring one for her, she stuck to Nariko's side a bit tighter, more anxiously than usual but otherwise kept her words to a minimum. She didn't feel like talking, didn't even feel like going anywhere near town and the last thing she wanted was to even heart Cuthbert's voice, which she had already spent the morning blocking out. And yet he somehow felt well enough to come along. Fantastic.

The doors pushed open in their rhythmic fashion and her first question of the day was directed at Roland even though she didn't bother with looking over at him.

"What are we here for again?" They had barely taken two steps in and she was already quite tired of everything, and it showed in her voice, and the fold of her arms over her stomach. If her oversized sweater and skinny jeans didn't make that just as clear then nothing else would.

Comments

[gunslingerqueen]

More than just a 'little', but Nariko only waved a hand. No use in getting huffy, the man had a point.

"Frankly, you're more enjoyable company. The inside of your skull doesn't feel like a kaleidoscope of screaming colors. I can be called upon by either of them at any time. Because distance is not an issue I'm free to stay where I please." And that had apparently been with Alain. But in tackling the second question the book finally hesitated, but it also backed away a bit, settling onto the table in an upright position.

"You must understand that I am a vehicle and nothing more. Your gun cannot aim at the correct target and subsequently fire on its own, Sir Johns, I am similarly only allowed to do what I have been tasked with. Nothing more, nothing less. The previous set of orders may have tipped ka to your favor, though in a far bloodier manner, but I was not given permission to make these spells available to you."

While Nariko seemed perfectly content to sit back and let the thing speak, Kaine looked at Bert, but then quickly to Roland. Was it just her or was something off about that explanation? She just couldn't place what it was. "But I was instructed to save the both of you in the moment you spoke your desire, not just Kai and for that I am as grateful as my parameters allow."

[atouchofka]

Alain was quiet for a moment, processing this information. At last, glancing at Roland and Bert, he cleared his throat. "Instructed by whom?" Nariko? It seemed unlikely. He didn't know her hugely well, but she didn't seem likely to have made that her priority. It was possible, of course, but...

"I'm sorry, are we just taking everything the talking book says at face value now?" Bert broke in from the doorway, looking between the four of them incredulously. "Just... I want to be clear on this. The creepy book that knocked Alain out for a day and a half and is currently floating. That book. That's our guide now?"

"Bert. Your mouth's flapping." Roland's voice was low, and allowed very little room for argument. "We'll discuss it later."

[apassingafternoon]

"Of course not you're free to figure it out your damn self!" With a sudden and unnerving, wet noise the once floating book clattered to the table with a harder this than its weight should have allowed but there it lay, as lifeless as before it's voice was found. Nariko reopened it to the page that depicted her father and by doing so took herself out of the conversation without anymore fuss.

"Why." It wasn't a question, but rather the most exasperated version of speech Kaine could put together as she glared at Bert. "Just, why?" Why make bad life decisions? Why not have any situational awareness outside of himself and Roland and Alain? What the fuck was with the complete lack of understanding for anyone else's feelings or intentions or actions? Just, why.

"Since only three of us have been paying attention," Kaine went on, knowing better than to tempt the sudden, uncharacteristic silence of her best friend, "I guess I'll reiterate: You don't just pick up a thing and know how to use it. It would have been ideal to make sure that any specific individuals were saved in the event of utter failure, but while I'm no expert on magic I'm going to say that's not something you just accomplish on a Tuesday morning. Roland, you were there during the entire fight with Claude, do you really think she could pull that off without hacking up another organ, like when she got rid of that pink thing?" A brief pause. "The answer is 'no', by the way. But if it wasn't her, then there's a chance it was that crazy bitch we have to see to get back."

[toweredingly]

"Lay off him," Roland said softly, looking at Bert, whose ears had turned scarlet. "Cuthbert. I'd talk to you dan-dinh for a moment, if you would."

Bert nodded, his expression a little sour, and stepped aside to let Roland out of the front door, following after him. That left Alain, who put his head in his hands, taking a deep breath. "And here I was hoping he'd gotten that out of his system," he muttered, against the heels of his hands, and looked up at Kaine. "He's good at caution. Never was much good at trust. Try to understand, he's an ass, but he's an ass who means well, for you and Nariko as much as for us. There's just a whole lot of pieces to this he won't let himself see."

[apassingafternoon]

"I know that he does." And Kaine really did, despite her frustration. She would apologize later and mean it, but right now it felt difficult to remain where she was. And to think they hadn't even made it to dinner yet. Christ. "There's enough that'll kill us happily if we're not careful, that caution is better aimed at literally everyone else that isn't in this room and that's including the creepy book." But it didn't seem as though caution and logic always came hand in hand so maybe it shouldn't have surprised her so much.

"It's been a day, you're expecting too much." Nariko was still focused on the book in her lap, but it seemed she had turned the page, and half read whatever was in front of her. "Being in a completely foreign world, losing your home and most all of the people in it," Nariko paused, and though she tried her best to hide it she had to put some effort into getting the words out. "Watching the girl you're in love with constantly attempt to die for you when you probably kind of want to be the one to either save her or at least come out on top and be especially impressive? It's a lot. My point is, give him longer than just a day. I'm just not in the mood to be the lightning rod at the moment, so he can hear the answers from you or Roland if it really helps. I'm just here for the Spaghetti Tacos and then alcohol."

Kaine found it in her to laugh, though it sounded much more jaded than she wanted. "So that's why you stayed." And then, wholly mournful. "… And he's not in love with me."

"Yes, Kaine, he really is." Nariko stood to find out what happened with that tea that Roland had been preparing but before that, she looked at Alain. "I cry your pardon, really and truly. I made a promise and intended to keep it, but I should have told you. I should have ton a lot of things differently."

[atouchofka]

"We all should," Alain said, meeting Nariko's eyes. "But you saved all our lives, and did a damned sight more than most people would or could." Getting to his feet, he cleared his throat and pulled her rather awkwardly into a hug. It was brief and a little uncomfortable, but it felt necessary. Pulling away, his cheeks pink, he rested his hands on her shoulders for a moment. "Thankee. If for nothing else, then for what you do for Roland. And I cry your pardon for keeping so much resting on you."

Clearing his throat again, he rubbed the back of his neck and went to sit back down, looking back at Kaine with a rather dry little smile. "As for you... I've known Bert for what, fifteen years or more? I've never seen him look at a woman - or a man - the way he looks at you. And," he added, his smile fading, "I've never met someone who mattered so much to him that I can imagine him leaving us for them. Not until now."

[apassingafternoon]

The hug was unexpected and so for Kaine to witness Nariko, the one true queen of all unnecessary and excessive physical affection, become so surprised was like a gift from the universe. Of course Nariko relaxed into it much more easily - at least until it occurred to her that Alain might feel as if he had to do something like this, and then she was awkward toward the end, too - but just about everything he said was a little confusing. She didn't really do much of anything for Roland! And it was true she had tried to help save at least the ka-tet, whether she actually succeeded might have been up for debate.

But Nariko got a hug and even though it was a slightly complicated one, it made her smile and lifted whatever internal darkness Bert had put there. It was really that simple.

Kaine fought to keep from laughing at the whole thing, at least until Alain decided to round on her. "Well, no one is leaving anyone, so that last part isn't relevant." But it also wasn't entirely true, was it? Because Kaine might be staying and that was as good as leaving. "So we have a book with at least two people controlling it at the same time. It could be worse." It wasn't that Alain's words hadn't meant anything to her but Kaine figured the embarrassed flush on her cheeks was enough of a response. Better to get back on topic and wait for the other two to come back.

[atouchofka]

"Seems to me that controlling may be overstating the situation. At least in my case." Alain seemed perfectly happy to let the subject of Bert drop. In fact, he was rather relieved to - he didn't really want to dwell on the fear that Kaine, with the best will in the world, might be another Susan. Their tet had suffered enough blows lately, without worrying about what might be.

Raking his hands back through his hair, he gave both women a slightly uncertain smile. "Anyroad, you're right. It could be worse. For one thing, we could all be dead. I'll stay grateful for that part for a while yet."

I am still at work but have feelings about your pm I will get to it asap!

[apassingafternoon]

"It's not a bad way to look at it," Kaine answered, and thoroughly meant every ounce of those words. Maybe it wouldn't be an easy life, but it was a whole lot better than not having anything at all.

"It may be overstating," Nariko added as she set the finished tea out, including two cups for Roland and Bert, whenever they returned. "But at the very least please trust me when I say that it isn't going to hurt you. I can live without the other two having much faith in me, but I'd rather you feel somewhat consoled."

"What's taking them so long?" That comment didn't go with the rest of the conversation but it was sort of worrying her now. "I wasn't really that upset," So why was Roland his sweet time?

may be asleep when you do. I am unreasonably tired rn. :/

[atouchofka]

Alain shrugged one shoulder, taking a cup from her with a smile and a little nod of thanks. "My guess? They're not just talking about you. Either of you." His smile faded, and he wrapped his hands around the cup, looking down at the tabletop. "They haven't talked dan-dinh since we arrived. Am I right? They have..."

He trailed off, looking at the door and sighing. "They have a lot to talk about. They'll be back before too long. If either of them has a black eye, I'd suggest not mentioning it."

no problem! I just did not want you to think I was ignoring it.

[apassingafternoon]

Kaine, who had no idea what most of that meant but it sounded important, so she let it go with a pout that could rival a child who had lost their favorite toy. "Well, since Nariko's stopped throwing a fit," To no one's surprise, Kaine earned a slight, non-threatening glare. "I'm starting on dinner. If you need anything just call, I'll be listening."

She just couldn't leave it to Nariko, who had thankfully avoided poisoning Roland for not just one, but three whole days. You couldn't push miracles like that.

"Any questions leftover?" Nariko asked, intent on putting more honey in her tea than anything else.

[atouchofka]

Alain was quiet for several moments, mulling it over and staring into his tea. "Enough to fill the rest of our lives," he said at last, rather wryly, and shook his head. "But only one that matters. Are you alright?" After all of that. She had looked so thoroughly lost back there, and then so determinedly focused, that he couldn't help but be concerned. It was in his nature.

[gunslingerqueen]

"That's a good question." And a surprising one, though she was beginning to take these sorts of things in stride. First Roland, and now Alain. It used to be that the only one who concerned themselves with her emotional state was Kaine. Not that there was any complaining on Nariko's end. And, just like with Kaine, it occurred to her to lie or work around the question without really answering it but that seemed useless. Not only could Alain likely spot a lie (whether he would call her on it would be something else) but he was so straightforward about it that anything but the truth was just ridiculous.

"Not really. I'm terrified, a failure, and I can't do anything for Roland, for you, or even Bert. That's a level of grief and loss that no one can really help but I still want to do something. And I'm not doing a good job of keeping away from certain feelings. But, then, being left alone for a few days makes that pretty difficult."

That was a nice way to sum up 'I'd like to not be in love with my own husband but now I'm even more in love with that idiot', right? Probably. "But, like you said, we're all alive." And that counted more than anything else.

[atouchofka]

"He seems to have that effect on people." Alain smiled fondly, ducking his head a little. "I've never understood quite why, but I'm coming to think it's inescapable." What he didn't say was that he was afraid it was inevitably a bad thing. Roland was an easy man to fall in love with, but a hard man to deal with, and he tended to bring disaster where he went. Alain was clear-headed enough and experienced enough to know that. And, frankly, he could sympathise with her.

He was going to say something more - perhaps reassure her that she was helping, that the fact that nobody had broken anything yet was testament to that - but before he had got the words together, Bert and Roland strode back inside, Bert a half-step behind his dinh.

"I cry your pardon," Bert said, the apology clearly smarting. "I should have held my tongue."

[apassingafternoon]

His warning wouldn't have done any good, Nariko understood all of that and wished that she didn't. Roland was easy to become intoxicated by, after all he had somehow won her over despite every hiccup and irritation between them. The sooner she went back to disassociating from her feelings again the safer she would be. And as soon as they returned home that was what she would do.

Just not know. She needed whatever faint sliver of love he could give her, and she knew exactly how pathetic that was.

Bert's apology, by comparison, was practically golden. Nariko had absolutely no illusions about Bert wanting to say it, but she could accept it in stride. "It's alright, Bert."

As if summoned by the call of his name Kaine appeared again, hair tied back and her apron on (the one with the tiny daisies). She looked between Bert and Roland, unsure of what to make of things. Clearing her throat awkwardly, Kaine tried, "So, vodka? Or is Nariko going to be the only drunk one?"

[askthelookout]

"That depends. If the vodka comes out, am I going to end up carrying you again?" Bert dropped back into his usual insouciant cheeriness, with barely a shadow in his eyes to hint at his embarrassment or regret (which, as it happened, was genuine). "Because, Kaine, you're a very slender and beautiful woman, but my back can only take so much carrying you around." Dropping her a wink, he shoved his hands deep in his pockets. "Seriously, though. I'm all for vodka, but I ought to get these bedamned clothes cleaned first. Al, you wanna point me to where you found that very fine outfit?"

[apassingafternoon]

Well, since Bert was still entirely capable of throwing her into a proverbial sea of embarrassment that materialized as a bright red flush on her cheeks, Kaine figured he was fine. She disappeared briefly to get the bottle and simply put it down on the table.

"I'd hate to accidentally throw myself at the wrong person-"

"Oh, I'm sure you'd pick him out just fine, even drunk!" By now Nariko was taking explicit joy in teasing while she dumped some vodka into her tea.

"-So I'm the sober friend today, your new clothes and back will be fine."

[toweredingly]

As Bert laughed, Roland found himself a seat next to Nariko, sitting down wordlessly and picking up one of the spare cups of tea. He didn't apologise for walking out midway through making it, but he did give Nariko and Kaine each a little nod of acknowledgement before he took a drink. After a moment, too, he let his hand drop onto Nariko's leg, looking back over at Bert. "There's clothes upstairs. New and old. You don't need Al to hold your hand."

"No, but sometimes it's nice," Bert responded without rancour, leaning over Alain's back with his chin on the shorter man's head and his arms slung around his shoulders. "You've got no heart, Ro', that's your trouble. Kaine, is there anything up there I oughtn't to touch?"

[apassingafternoon]

The Bert-Alain hybrid of limbs was funny and it was what put a little grin on Kaine's face despite the question. "No, everything that's private has already been locked up and put in the attic. They're just clothes, so take whatever you'd like." It was still a little odd to see them in her father's clothing, but her memory was still so fuzzed and uncertain when it came to both of her parents that she didn't feel any sense of invasion in letting them use whatever.

Kaine lingered to watch them go before she would inevitably return to the kitchen, but Nariko looked over at Roland. It was nothing but a questioning glance an is everything alright look. It wasn't her place to ask what had been discussed, and she had no intention of doing so, but there wasn't a force in the world that wouldn't override her concern for them both. Bert just really tested that idea sometimes, that was all.

[toweredingly]

Roland answered her with a little nod, taking a moment to drink his tea before adding aloud, "He's going to town with me in the morning. He needs breathing space, and I can use the help getting those guns back to Wei." He considered for a moment, then mimicked Nariko, sloshing a generous tot of vodka into his tea and taking another drink. "Ought to give Alain and Kaine both some time to recover. You, too.

[gunslingerqueen]

She raised a brow at Roland as if the words he dared to speak were revolutionary. There was a chance she was just kidding but it was a little difficult to tell. "I'm fine, Roland, it barely hurts anymore." Of course she got the feeling he wasn't exactly talking about her wound, but the fact remained. "Hopefully it does him some good."

She could leave it at that, even though she still wondered why he'd go through the trouble of hefting the guns all the way back. But, whatever, maybe it was more for his own and Bert's sake. "Are you ready for tacos? They'll amaze you." A better question was, did Roland have enough patience in him to deal with her whole drunk?