apassingafternoon | hail of arrows

hail of arrows

To graduate from utter silence to the constant roar of Gilead was something else. Though she had been here for over a week now, and would stay for much longer, Kaine was not used to the constant noise. Even at night it felt as if she could hear every shuffle of bodies in sheets and night clothes, every fuck whether positive or not, and all those conversations that were never suited for daylight. It all made sleeping outside difficult, but even lying beside Nariko didn't make it any easier to deal with the walls all around her. They were suffocating. At night and in the day, they threatened to drive Kaine out of her mind.

So she took to wandering around because there wasn't fuck else to do around here, not for her.

Which might have explained catching sight of him towards an edge, around a corner. The specifics weren't relevant, that Kaine saw Bert and spun on her worn down heel and followed him was relevant. It should have also been worrying for her, this unnatural and constant fascination that was tempered by the occasional bout of good sense felt odd. It was a ... Not a problem, but not exactly good. Crushes on men that you hardly knew, that hid the way Cuthbert did, that never let her finish talking the way Cuthbert did couldn't end well.

She followed anyway, and not with any real ounce of subtlety or control. Eventually one of them would have to say something and in her own way she knew he might take that responsibility first. So she followed, and even if Kaine happened to be wrong he was pretty interesting to stare at anyway. Maybe it was the hair.

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"Let's not." Bert pulled a face, taking a long swig of water himself. "All the good places I know for starting fights are down in the lower town, and if you think I'm taking you all that way in this state, then I'm going to go ahead and assume you hit your head too."

Scraping his hair back out of his eyes, he shook his head to try and clear it a little, looking up at the castle in front of them. The lights were coming on, spark-lights and oil lamps and candle flames. It was really quite beautiful, but that wasn't why he was looking.

"There's a spare bed up near Alain's room," he said at last. "It's not made up, but I'm guessing you don't care too much. C'mon. No fighting. Bed."

"Why're you so cl-ear?" It really seemed as if she was getting drunker with each passing second. Her tone was beyond slurred, in fact what were meant to be words could sound like awkward, jumbled imitations of language. "You should be riduc'lous and-and!!!" That was a lot of build up for two repeated words but at least she sort of awkwardly careened in the direction Bert meant to take her. "And not s'damnfuckin' smart, like, what is this?"

Her other hand came up to hold his cheek, tried to get him to look at her while her usually placid, calm gray-blue eyes were set on fire as she asked, very seriously, "What's with all of this Cuthbert? You've gott'a be clea-r like the rest of us sometimes!!"

He met her eyes for a moment, his dark eyes serious, then shook his head and said lightly, in a really rather good impression of her, "I don't gott'a be anything, sai. It's all part of my wild, madcap appeal." Then, reverting back to his own voice, "Come on, Kaine. You're drunk. Don't ever ask questions when you're drunk, you'll only regret the answers in the morning. And, since you're drunk, I'll let you off for the part where you said I'm not meant to be smart."

Laughing, he reached up to take her hand away from his face, steadying her as they headed towards the little wooden door a few hundred yards away.

His imitation of her helped put a look of fascination in her eyes, as if she was entirely convinced that, at least in voice, Cuthbert was obviously her. Whether she really believed that was impossible to tell when drunk but for the moment she only made a vaguely irritated noise at being ordered to not do something, and purposely leaned on him more as if that would really get in his way. Kaine wasn't without her own strength but she was slim, quicker than she was blessed with brawn, so to speak.

"Why do I feel so hot! This is annoying!" She whined and scratched her own neck as if that might relieve the flush that had grown there and over the rest of her. "Alcohol is so dumb. But then it's so good, too and everything is sort of like that. But not you. You're smart. jus' shouldn't be smart while drinking!" Or, wait, had he only been playing around when he said that? Oh, well.

He patted her shoulder, pulling a face. "Years of practice, my dear apprentice. Years of long and arduous training in the use of alcohol. You'd be amazed how fast you learn to be smart when you might have to stop being drunk suddenly and go shoot things." He grinned, ear to ear, and loosened his grip on her just a little as they reached the door, long enough to lean over and open it. "Dumb but good wouldn't be too bad, though, I guess. Just look at Roland. It seems to do him fine. Come on, let's get you to bed."

"That's ridiculous," Since she laughed along with that statement Kaine could have meant the surely loving jab that he had just delivered to Roland. It was also likely to have been something else entirely but it didn't really matter, did it? Especially since, though she obviously lacked her mind after just a few drinks, Kaine hadn't lost an ounce of her speed. Cuthbert let go and that was all the free reign she needed to squirm in his hold, very obviously trying to get away.

"No!" Never mind that she had been the one to ask for a bed. If she were sober Kaine might have stomped away as she thought she was doing, but it was really more of a non-threatening shuffle that occasionally did enough damage that she smacked into a wall.

"Oh, for..." Throwing his hands up dramatically, Cuthbert rolled his eyes and darted after her. She wasn't the only one who was fast, and he was not only less drunk but also less liable to lose his balance even if he'd been completely wasted. "Why did I think wine was a good idea?"

He grabbed for her shoulders with both hands, ducking in front of her and making eye contact. "Bed. Now. Or I'm carrying you there, and if I throw my back out, it'll be your fault."

"Because wine." And that was a great reason to think that wine was a good idea! Because it was there. He also had absolutely no way of knowing that Kaine had the alcohol tolerance of wet paper being torn into shreds. Her dazed eyes squinted at him as if she couldn't see Bert - and in a sense she couldn't! There were maybe six or eight Berts and all of them were trying to speak at the same time. - and in the end she patted his shoulders, and apparently missed every word he'd spoken.

"No, no, I'm fine, I'm okay. O-okay!" She drew out the first and last letters of that word just to make herself laugh again as her hands knocked Bert's off of her shoulders and she went right back to going ... Well, wherever she intended to go. "This way - Let's just go this way!"

Bert sighed loudly, sticking his hands in his pockets and striding along beside her. "Well," he declared to the sky, "that'll teach me to be generous. I did warn her. Never let it be said I didn't warn her."

Which was the only warning she was getting before he darted in front of her again, ducked down, and moved to lift her over his shoulder.

He might as well have been talking to himself because Kaine didn't hear a word, she was only there to witness her world slipping up and around as he picked her up. She squealed, twisting in his hold but Bert was given a small miracle, she didn't attempt to kick him in his chest or get the back of his head with her elbow, instead she struggled to grip the back of his shirt, and clamped onto him like a terrified spider monkey.

"What the hell! Where'd you - go? Berrrrrrrrtt!!" If nothing else she wouldn't be moving away from him anytime soon! So, hey, mission accomplished.

"You're going to bed," Bert replied, smirking, and started towards the door again. Carrying her wasn't the easiest thing in the world - like her, he was built more for speed than strength - but it was remarkably satisfying. The wine might have been responsible for that satisfaction, of course.

The probability that she might vomit down his back was less satisfying, but what was life without a little risk?

"I swear," he told her casually, as he carried her inside, "I have never seen anyone get so drunk on so little. We need to work on your stomach."

While moving back and forth (or at least the equivalent) certainly tempted her insides to become the outside, Kaine managed to hold back. She didn't want to deal with the vile taste anymore than Bert wanted it down his back, after all. "Nnnnn!" Because that was a response. "Tha' was strong wine, dammit! S'not my fault!"

It probably wasn't even vaguely strong, she really was an unbelievable lightweight, her grandmother had been one, too. It was probably the most screwed up family inheritance she could have ended up with.

"Keep telling yourself that, sai," Bert answered with a smirk, waving cheerily at the servant who stopped to stare, and didn't break his stride until they reached the foot of the stairs. Here, he stopped, considering the tall stone staircase and the weight of the woman on his shoulder. The two didn't seem like they would go too well together.

"Alright," he said, after a moment. "If I put you down, are you going to run off again? Because I can and will pick you back up."

She was quiet, and the only real indication that she hadn't fallen asleep yet was that she breathed normally against his back, and occasionally swung her legs and hips a little. Didn't exactly help the weight problem.

"... Will you give me a hug if I don't?"

It was a very simple deal, all things considered!

"Sure." Smiling, he lowered her carefully to the ground, being extra-sure to support her with one arm while she found her feet again. "But after we get you upstairs. Deal?"

Honestly, he could think of plenty worse things than giving a hug to someone like her, even if it was slightly mitigated by just how obviously drunk she was. But hugs were good, in his book, so that was a win-win.

Being put back on the ground was not nearly as satisfying or relaxing as it should have been. She made a displeased noise but didn't fight, nor did she run. "D-e-a-l..." Now she felt sick and unsteady and, as if that would really do any good she wanted to drink more to chase the feeling away, but instead Kaine kept the feeling of his arm around her and tried to remain docile. All that really mattered to her was that if she fulfilled some amount of obligations, she would get a hug.

And hugs were really, really good.

"Great!" He smiled brightly, ducking under one of her arms to support her better, and started up the stairs. "Then let's get you to bed. Glass of water and some sleep, and you'll be feeling just fine come morning."

He hoped she would, anyway. If she woke up with a raging hangover, it would be entirely his fault - besides which, he didn't particularly fancy seeing her temper when she was in that state. Ah, well. She'd be near Alain up here, so if the worst came to the worst, he'd wheedle that much nicer friend into seeing to her. The important thing was getting her to bed now.

"Mmhm." She didn't believe that at all. She would have a terrible, throbbing headache that would leave her in bed for hours, if not the whole day. Thankfully Bert and Alain would be spared anything to do with it and Kaine would only bitch and whine for Nariko, who would inevitably take care of her.

Kaine shifted beside him to try and grab his arm or some part of him, at least now she was doing her best to help him, not hurt! That was improvement.

Bert steadied her with an ease that said he'd done this plenty of times before - as indeed he had, usually while drunker than this; Jamie's head for alcohol wasn't as good as Bert's, and he tended to be mostly passed out when they headed back up to the castle - and looked over at her with a little smirk. "Well, at least you ought to learn something from all this. Never trust dashingly handsome rogues who offer you drinks!"

"Hmm?" Her tone was two octaves lower than it should have been and now her voice was thick with exhaustion. "Nahhhhhh. Nope! Na-ha! Because usually when I'm drunk - and alone and not that I am drunk right now! - rogues are the ones that look at me funny 'n I have to punch them a lot because - yeah. You," She reached up and, of all things, pinched his nose. "You're nice. You're a good guy! It's all good. We're good."

Anything other than the vague memory in her mind was good.

He wriggled his nose in response, pulling a face. "I'm not nice. I'm an asshole. Ask anyone." He was joking, obviously. Despite himself, it was really rather nice to be told he was a good guy. He was usually the one telling Roland that; it had been a remarkably long time since anyone had said that to him in so many words. But he wasn't about to say so.

Instead, he just tweaked her nose right back, grinning, and pulled a stupid face, eyes comically wide and tongue sticking out. "When you say look at you funny, you mean like this?" Then, cross-eyed and with his face screwed up in a parody of concentration. "Or this?" One eyebrow raised, lips pursed, squinting slightly. "Maybe this?"

The nose tweaking made her giggle, unusually light and sweet. "No, No," But all of those option were hilarious and it was very difficult to feel sick when she was so busy being amused. "I mean, like this!"

She gripped him very suddenly, drew her face close to his not because she actually planned on kissing him but because it was the simplest way to get the look on her own face. That almost salacious, downright predatory gleam in her eyes paired with a knowing and rather hungry smirk. It was a sexual look from top to bottom and that Kaine could imitate it so easily despite her lack of experience, and despite her own general embarrassment was really something.

But just as suddenly as she had pulled it off, she broke out into a grin again and let him go so that they could keep walking. On a normal occasion she would have already known that he didn't need the explanation but drunk Kaine was nothing if not moderately helpful, at times!

Helpful was one way of putting it. Personally, Cuthbert would have considered that look more helpful if it hadn't just made him mildly uncomfortable in his trousers. Which was absolutely not his fault. It was the alcohol. Definitely and absolutely the alcohol, and nothing more than that. Definitely nothing to do with beautiful women giving him sexual looks. Nope. Alcohol.

Clearing his throat, he grinned back, patting her on the shoulder. "You ought to go and join the theatre," he commented lightly, helping her up onto the first landing. "You feeling alright?"

Alcohol!

"Fine, fine, fine, fine!" So fine that she had to repeat it multiple times, apparently. If there was any remnant of the Kaine that created a reaction there was no finding it now, she leaned into him a little more and scuffed her boots on the floor as they made it, making yet another 'bluhh' sort of noise. "Also theatre is dumb. And 'm not very funny. Not even a little, actually! And why have we been on the stairs for forever? That's a long time, Bert. When do we come back from the war."

For as rapidly as she spoke Kaine edged closer to exhaustion, though whether that would be colored by another burst of emotion or not had yet to be seen. For now her legs began to shake and she occasionally bowed in towards him, and huffed every time it happened as if she was irritated with her own body.

"Forever's a long time, but we're only halfway up. So I guess we've got another forever to go." Bert stuck out his lower lip, blowing his hair out of his face, and started up the next set of stairs. He was careful to support her when she started to shake, checking his grip around her waist so he knew he could catch her if she actually fell, but that didn't mean he wasn't still concerned by that.

Crap. He was going to have to sit with her and make sure she got to sleep all right, wasn't he? Or maybe he could just leave her with a bucket and warn Alain.

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